Brown and Autistic: Love, For Me, Is Like…

Me in Keyboard MagazineMy occupation is musician. I’ve been part of some very cool moments in entertainment industry history. Some groundbreaking; some heartbreaking, but, always life altering. Even in this wild exclusive environment of loud music, the promotion of excess and overall universal happy place for creative independence, we, syrupy sweet musician types, just want loyal love; a muse. We become our best creative selves when with that perfect partner. You know; Paul and Linda. John and Yoko. It’s not always an easy thing to do in the, often, fast paced, chaotic and public environment we can find ourselves in. For me, specifically, I’m a behind-the-scenes guy. I prefer hanging in a sound proof recording studio creating, mixing, arranging and writing. Occasionally, I’ll throw in a bit of singing. This not-so-flashy part of the music business is hidden from view, much of the time. It’s, manageably, more stable than being the stage performing artist, though, I have seen entertainers last for many decades doing the tour thing. Wow! Not, me.

“It’s even more important for me…to remain vigilant to the financial needs of (in my case) two autistic peoples unique health and lifestyle requirements.”

Love-MoneyTo work in this field, while experiencing it through a spectrumite mind, is incredibly (and equally) awe-inspiring and frustrating. First, the frustration. Stability is not a strong suit of an entertainment business job. If anyone wants to enjoy the prospect of a lifelong romantic love relationship, there will be a demand for security. It’s no different for folks on the spectrum. With some monetary security comes a measure of protection or safety. Security and safety; two important factors for keeping any loving relationship intact. It’s even more important for me, being Brown and on the spectrum, to remain vigilant to the financial needs of (in my case) two autistic peoples unique health and lifestyle requirements. Hair, skin and dietary care for melanin rich people tends to be more expensive. Whether this extra expense happens by design, or, is a consequence of Brown people not owning multinational toiletry and food companies, the added burden is real and must be overcome. It’s my job to rise above the circumstances and solve the problem. That’s been my mantra since I can remember ‘remembering’.

“Having that one person who, not just understands, but, appreciates your unique thinking process, is more than one can ask for.”

Second, the awesome inspiration. Me & Morna3Though I’m quite content with myself (have inner joy) and am a self sufficient man, I want to share my life. I feel confident I have something to offer. I can cook, sew (mend clothes), repair and maintain my transportation, landscape, do electrical work, repair computers (sometimes), repair appliances and do most things I put my mind to. Obviously, none of these reasons are why I desire a partner for life. Having that one person who not just understands, but, appreciates your unique thinking process is more than one can ask for. I’ve found that kind of loyal love; a love that is truly inspiring. For seven years, now, I’ve had the pleasure of being with someone whom I enjoy an inviolable connection. When we first met, it felt like I’d known her since childhood; the perfect fit. Inconveniently, she is on the other side of the planet, for now. Yes, technology helps bridge that gap, somewhat. However, I’m working exhaustingly hard prioritizing getting her here to the states. Once here, under the proper conditions, all will be well with the world.



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